Shame On Me

I totally fell off the wagon this past weekend. I had such a great week, I was working hard, worked out 5 times that week and not just 20 minutes, 45 minutes each time!! I had only lost 2 lbs but was happy with that. Then came the weekend, oh boy was it bad. I've never really been much for self control, it's something I am still in the process of overcoming and definitely is one of my greatest weaknesses. If the food is not in my house I can easily resist it and will not go out of my way for it but put temptation in front of me and I'm all over it. As I was shoving down the cold slice of pizza that Clara didn't want to eat and the cake I didn't really like I was thinking to myself how much I was going to regret this, it's not that good, I don't need to be eating this but I kept on chewing.

Saturday I was motivated to get back on track, it was a new day. Then I went to my parent's house. As I walk in my mom says, "let's go to Chewy's!" Um, free lunch?? OK!! Luckily I only got fajitas, it could have been a lot worse and I only ate 2 which is pretty good for me but still, I should have been stronger. Then that night we headed over to my cousin's house and when we go there good food is always in abundance. This time it was an amazing pizza, not just the crappy dominos or something but real italian like pizza, my favorite!! So I couldn't just stop at 1 slice, not 2, not even 3! 4, yes 4 slices of pizza and they weren't small slices either. Well, I've ruined it already might as well eat the brownies covered in fudge and caramel too. UGH!!!

And don't even get me started on Sunday, it was not a good day and of course I take my aggressions out on the Jello no bake chocolate mousse pie!!!!!! It didn't even see it coming, after the 3rd slice my mom just laughed at me, thanks for the support mom. So yeah, BAD weekend and shame on me. Monday will be better....

WRONG!!!! We went to the Fort Worth Stock Show which is basically a mini carnival so of course I eat sugar coated nuts, funnel cake (luckily only 1 bite), couple bites of a pretzel, french fries, hamburger, then a nice light Pei Wei for dinner. No wonder if feel AWFUL today.

I'm writing all this not so you can be totally disgusted with me, though I'm sure that is a result, but for myself because I really do feel incredibly awful today, my stomach isn't right, I'm tired, and feel blah with all that nasty food and fat lingering. So I'm writing this as a reminder to myself to NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!!!! It's not worth it, the food's delicious flavor is fleeting and will only make me miserable the next day. Working out today was hard, I had no energy and I felt heavy. I can do better than that, I'm better than that, food is fuel not to be over indulged but to fuel my body to do happy and productive things like play with my kids, exercise, clean and have a good night's sleep. So yeah, hopefully I wont be doing that again.